Le Franch. Les Fufu. Le Ça Va?

This needs to be quick.

Onion Soup. You think it's something crazy, something off the wall, something French and complicated. But it's not. It's basically like everything else that's French, it's simple, somewhat historically refined and basically just based in peasantry. Therefore, leftovers.

Nothing against the French, really. No really. Nothing against the French.

So French Onion Soup has always been one of those things that I love in restaurants and won't make myself. But since I watch a shit load of cooking shows and stuff, I saw a chef on TV (won't say who it is) make an onion soup. Now, I wouldn't be devulging that I've taken and used ideas from TV and TV chefs. It's all right. I doubt they're mad. We're all friends here... Me and my keyboard and this glass of shitty Bordeaux.

Realized that I had a load of veal stock in the the freezer while I was watching this TV chef make this soup. He was making it with Beef Stock. Well Veal, Beef, this isn't the Micheal Jackson trial, what the hell, I have some leftover veal stock.

French Onion Soup

3 yellow onions, sliced
2 cups veal stock
2 cups chicken stock
5 sprigs thyme, leaves only
2 tbsp butter
Glass of shitty (or shit-tay) white wine
salt, pepper
block o' gruyere cheese
A baguette

Put the sliced onions in a pot on melted butter. Very low heat. Enough to sizzle just a tiny tiny bit but not to saute. Caramelize the onion for about 45 mins to an hour. Yeah yeah, that's the problem it takes a little while. Be patient. Put the thyme in as well. Salt it and go for the duration.

In about an hour it should be browned, like caramel. Deglaze with the white wine. Reduce by half, pour the stocks over it, re-season and simmer for a half an hour.

Meanwhile make some croutons out of slices of the baguette. Broil slices of it in the oven for just a few minutes. I thought it would take a while and I burned 5 slices while I was writing this. Now my place is all smokey.

Anyways. Put a couple croutons on the bottom of an oven safe bowl, ramekin, or whatever they call those things they serve onion soup in. Put a big pinch of grated gruyere on the croutons. Ladle some of the soup in the bowl but not to the rim. Put another couple croutons on top of that and a shitload (scientific measurement) of grated gruyere on top of that. Put that in the broiler and keep a close eye on it. When it bubbles, let it go for a few more minutes and let it brown just slightly. SLIGHTLY DAMMIT!

Pull out of the oven, let stand for about 3 minutes. It's hot dick, so be careful. Serve.

The Funniest Shit Ever

http://www.savetoby.com/

Bam Beeta Rita, This Is 'bout Yo' Pita!!

Couldn't hold back on this one, I had to put it down. 2 peeps to thank.

Actually it was a couple good friends of mine, the first of whom I'll call A2 for purposes of this discussion, that reminded me that I should take the time to do so. I didn't have the time right then, when she said she was having The Drunken Chef withdrawals, to let her know that I really hadn't been cooking for a while but if maybe she'd have asked her husband, A1 (not the steak sauce), she would've known that I was spending a lot of dough by going out a little too much to eat, lately.

That right there is the kind of sentence that got me through college. Amazing, I know. I'm hugely comma friendly.

The second, and supremely fabulous, I'm only gonna refer to as B, also sparked the flame a little and made me sit down and—type. Thanks B. This pathetic shout out's for you...

So, wrap ya'll 's bad selves 'round this.

I realized this last weekend that it was back to the time that I have to spend a little less dough. I've been going out something fierce and spending a load of money being social and what not so for the first time ever, I've actually had to get a cash advance on my credit card, now for which I'm sadly em-bare-assed. I literally may have a bare ass from this.

Anyways...

Spiced Grilled Chicken, Grilled Veggies, Feta and Yogurt Pitas

Here's what I did.

10 Chicken "Fryer" Thighs (I did this purposely because they were $1.99/lb. 10 of them was 4 1/3 pounds. Yeah. Ch-ch-ch-cheap. You can do boneless/skinless... if you're all like that 'r whatev.

5 Zuchini about 7 inches in length. Sliced in half, length-wise. Be careful to choos ones dat will zlice in halfe length vize.

2 Green bell peppers, cored and sliced by length about .5 inch or so thick.

2 Red bell peppers, cored. 1 of which sliced like the Greens, the other chopped fine.

2 Yellow Onions, sliced circular, only 4 times! You want thick, like what you'd use for onion rings — thick slices. Don't let them fall apart! You want slices, not rings.

Crumbled Feta. IT DOES NOT MATTER how little or how much. If you want to make a Feta cake with some veggies and chicky in it, I don't care. Monitor your own Feta. It's great stuff, low-fat, not THAT great for your ya, but still... You got your own Feta under control, cool?

Cool.

Some Plain Yogurt and some Organic Pita Breads. The organic one's are tastier in my opinion, but if hey, if you want to get crazy and tell me to stick it, I don't care if you use say a Tortilla, or even a Hollowed Sweet Roll. It's endless I tell you, endless. You need a little something to wrap the filling in.

Yes, the chicken, zuchini, bell peppers, feta, onion and yogurt are the filling.

Here we go, here's how we're going to put it together. First heat your grill. I actually did this with a Foreman and you can stop laughing right now, it works great. Get your grill 'Chicken Hot.' If you have a grill, every grill has it's own 'Chicken Hot' except maybe a stovetop, or Foreman Grill. My Foreman was on about a 4 but you know what I'm saying, you have to know your equipment.

Rinse your Chicky Thighs and remove the skin. Ok, Ok, you could have paid your man at the store to do this. You could have not bought the Fryers but bought the Boneless/Skinless. Sure you could have. Or you could do what we're doing. Paying nothing for the same thing.

Rinse your thighs (mind out of gutter, mind out of gutter...) and as you're putting the rinsed thigh down on the cutting board, have a pearing knife ready and as you're pulling the skin off the top of the thigh, help it along with the blade. It comes off all the way, easily, and then it get's stuck. Cut it right there. You'll know what I'm talking about after the first 2. It's right at the edge... 'Bember, lower fat is what we're after.

When you have the thighs all ready to go, cleaned of the skin etc, and your grill is hot to accept chicken, put in a bowl some Olive Oil, Salt (quite a bit of salt), Fresh Ground Pepper, and some of your favorite spices. You can really go crazy here, put whatever spices you want. You want super spicy, go Cayenne or Chili Powder! Middle-Eastern, try Tarragon or Corriander, Cumin... Hell, try crumbled Twinkie!! You get the point.

Thongs, Chicken, Bowl with Olive Oil Mook in It, Grill. That's what's happening.

While the Chicken does it's thing, let's play with veggies. You've got your Zuchini's halved length-wise. They have to be this way so you can deal with them easily on the grill. Same with the size of the Chicken, Onion and Peppers. You're going to chop all of this stuff, eventually, to the size you want in your Pita. You know where I'm going with this, I'm sure. If you like a few giant pieces of Chicken and a very fine vegetable mixture around it, that's the way you're going to make it. Chop the veggies, once grilled (after the Chicken), to whatever fineness you prefer. I like them all super thick. I'm lazy though and chop all this stuff just enough to have pieces. You can make a much finer presentation and much finer taste if you chop some of the veggies a bit more.

Your Chicken is done. Take it off the grill, put the veggies on. In batches if you have to, no problem. The Zuchini, should go skin side down first. Season it. Salt, Ground Pepper, Anything. Put something on it. If you don't season the vegetables when they cook, this dish will be very bland. The only thing seasoned here is the Chicken so far, so be sure to throw at least some salt on the vegetables. Both sides, God damn it. Both sides.

While the veggies are doing their thing at their own speed, grab your cleaver or "B.I.N." (Big Ass Nife) and work the meat of the cooked chicken thighs. Chop 'em up. Obviously with the intent of cleaning the bone, not chopping the bone. Chop the meat off the bone into pieces that you'd like in your filling. Put it in a big pot, or bowl, whatever, just keep in mind the veggies are next, and the cheese and a little bit of yogurt, so make sure it's big enough.

As the veggies get done, the Onion will be first, chop it to the size you want and throw it in the pot.

The last finely chopped Red Pepper don't put that on the grill. Put that in the mixture last for some added crisp...

Now that all the goods are in the pot (are they? Check, look around.) Add the chopped Red Pepper, Crumbled Feta, and maybe a quarter cup of the yogurt. Now, if you're doing this as something to wrap up for lunch like I did, do it this way. If you're doing it to serve, don't put in the yogurt. Put that on top.

Stuff each Pita half with as much filling as it will take and wrap it in some foil. My yield was about 18 Pitas. I mean I've had 2 for lunch today and 3 for dinner so far, and I don't feel like I'm eating anything bad. In actuality, there's hardly any fat and it's packaged, by you, to eat whenever, whatever...